Recently I have seen quite a few clients with complaints of stress, worry, negative thoughts, feelings of overwhelm, and generalized anxiety. I am very sympathetic towards anyone who experiences these conditions. My mother suffered from vague fears and anxieties. Though she coped extremely well, her insecurities kept her from stepping into her full potential. Sometimes on the phone she would talk about stressful situations and report symptoms that I knew from my work with clients were symptoms of anxiety. My heart went out to her because I knew it held her back from having a happier, more fulfilling, life. Unfortunately many people suffer from the stressors caused by our current society.
Listening to the today’s news can raise the anxiety level of even the most normal person. There is plenty to worry about – another imminent military action/war, the upcoming election with controversial candidates, worries of aging, job loss, health and health care cost, raising costs (though no one mentions inflation), parenting in today’s culture, being 39 and not married and childless, civil unrest and cries of police brutality. Let’s face it, in our society today there is an underlying mass consciousness of fear, or inter’fear’ence, that can undermine your sense of security, confidence and well-being.
Living with inter’fear’ence is like living with a mantle of negativity that blocks out the light of reason, confidence, and clarity so that sometimes you find yourselves floundering in doubt, worry and anxiety. These negative emotions and thoughts are taxing on your body as well as on your emotional and physical well-being. It can lead to headaches, IBS, indigestion, hyper-tension, insomnia, weakening of your immune systems, etc. Anxiety and worry is hazardous to your health!
Symptoms of anxiety can range from a rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, clammy hands, tingling in face or hands, butterflies in the stomach, tightness in the chest, to racing or intrusive thoughts. Anxiety is your body over-reacting to a perceived danger. Our bodies evolved during pre-historic times when our ancestors had real danger, such as the saber-toothed tiger, that they had to fight or flee from. It’s your flight or fight syndrome. Today, you don’t confront physical danger on a daily basis, but you do have psychological or emotional stress. Your body just doesn’t know the difference.
The frustrating thing about anxiety is that you can literally think yourself into a heightened state of anxiety. This can happen anywhere – driving a car, walking the dog, lying in bed at night – and almost without noticing it your mind can shift to worrisome thoughts or difficult situations. Suddenly you might feel the grip of anxiety and your peaceful relaxed state is gone. Yet nothing changed but your thoughts.
The good news about the mind’s ability to create anxiety is that if you can think yourself into anxiety, then you can also think yourself out of it! Because of this, anxiety is one of the most treatable conditions there is.
There are two techniques that I find helpful in dealing with anxiety. They are always available to you wherever you are. They are: deep breathing and coping statements.
Your breathing can convey messages to your body. When you need to move, especially quickly, you tend to breathe from your chest which enables your body to move more quickly. Most people with anxiety are chest breathers. Conversely you can send a message to your body to relax and calm down just by breathing slowing and deeply. The trick is to catch yourself immediately when feel yourself becoming anxious. Then, consciously, begin to breathe deeply and slowly. Breathe in through your nose, take the breath deep into your diaphragm, hold it for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly and evenly. If you close your eyes and focus on your breath for just 3 to 5 minutes, then you will be able to relax into a greater state of calm.
The second technique is coping statements, which are positive statements that help you to rationally accept your feelings of anxiety. Anxiety is simply your body’s over-reaction to a perceived danger that most likely doesn’t exist in the present moment. By acknowledging this, and doing some deep breathing, you can either head off an attack, or ride it out with more ease and less struggle. Examples of coping statements would be:
- Anxiety is NOT dangerous – just uncomfortable. I’ve survived feelings like this and worse before.
- I can be anxious and still function effectively. (Just stay focused on the task at hand and breathe.)
- Remember: whatever scary thing I’m thinking about is not happening now. Right now things are fine, just fine. This anxiety I’m feeling is just a nuisance and nothing more.
- There is no need to be frightened, or to fight what I am feeling. Even though it’s uncomfortable, it’s just my body over-reacting to some perceived danger. Everything is fine. This will pass and I will be OK.
We live in times of inter’fear’ence, but no one needs to suffer unduly from anxiety. If you suffer from worries and fears that cause anxiety, then try these methods above. If they aren’t sufficient to help you cope with your fears and anxiety, then contact me, or a healthcare professional, and get help with alleviating your anxiety. You deserve to live a happy life of contentment and well-being. Email Joy@JoyReichard.com or call Joy 415-819-8769 today!